Please Don't Help My Kids

A Patch blogger's post about not helping her children on the slide is being debated across the country.

A Patch blog from Alameda, CA, called “Please Don’t Help My Kids” has struck a nerve with readers across the country. Posted in September, the blog has taken off over the past few weeks as it has found a second life through social media sharing. The blog has 124,000 Facebook recommendations and 833 people have tweeted the blog. The blog is an open letter to other parents at the playground. The blogger Kate Bassford Baker’s basic request is for parents to not help her daughters on the slide. She wrote that she wants her daughters to do things and learn things on their own. Learning to walk up the slide’s ladder is the first step to learning new things and overcoming obstacles, she wrote. “Because, as they grow up, the ladders will only get …

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Life in the Mom Lane

Lance Armstrong Saga Is A Cautionary Tale For Young Athletes

Lance Armstrong, the role model, failed his son and his young fans.

Like most of America, I have to admit to watching at least some of Lance Armstrong’s interview with Oprah last week. I’ve seen bits and pieces replayed on the news and watched videos of the interview on various websites around the Internet. Perhaps the most poignant moment for me was when Armstrong described the pain he felt while admitting to “doping” to his 13-year-old. As Armstrong explained it was when it was when he heard his oldest son, Luke, defending him that he knew he had to admit what he had done to him. Without a doubt that was likely the moment that Armstrong won over the hearts of many viewers but the reality is, mine simply isn’t one of them. Like Armstrong, I have a 13-year-old son and can certainly understand how difficult…

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How Many Gifts Is Appropriate For Kids on Christmas?

Many parents find themselves trying to "keep up with the Joneses"

Yesterday, when speaking to a friend, an interesting subject came up. She had been reading updates on Facebook and one of her friends had posed a question that she found a little odd. It seems that this mom was looking to find out how many gifts other families were leaving under the Christmas Tree for their children. Upon reading further she found that a number of people had chimed in and basically given counts on what their kids would be getting for the holiday. I have to admit that, like her, I found the whole post just a bit disconcerting. Yes, we all like to spoil our children on Christmas. We want to see their faces light up when the open gifts and, often, are just as excited as they are. What I don’t understand, however, is taking …

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Have You Reviewed with Your Children What to Do in 'Danger' Scenarios? Should You?

A week after the Newtown, CT, massacre, schools have reviewed their safety procedures. Now should parents follow up with more coaching?

A week after the deadly elementary school attack in Newtown, CT, that has rocked the the nation, some parents say their kids remain oblivious to the attack—and the danger.  Most teens and children are wrapped up in their own worlds. One mom of a middle-schooler told me instead of being worried about how the Newtown deaths would affect her daughter, she is more concerned that the girl is not aware enough of what took place. And there is only so much the schools can do. So this mom will spin out a scenario of danger and ask the daughter to think through how she might best respond.  If you are a parent, are you doing the same kind of 'coaching' with your kids? Should parents be following up and expanding on the schools' safety procedures and …

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Turning Back The Clock

Columnist Christine Mackenzie gets a reminder of what it's like to be 1-on-1 with a toddler.

Let’s face the facts; motherhood is not an easy job.  The take home pay is non-existent, the hours are grueling and, frankly, the benefits package doesn’t always seem to measure up. No two stages of motherhood are alike and, sometimes, it can seem like the toughest job on earth. As the mom of a 13-year-old I sometimes look at old pictures and wonder how my son could possibly be a teenager already. While some moms I know long for their kids to be babies again I have to admit that I have enjoyed watching my son grow into a self-sufficient and independent young man. Unlike a lot of moms that I know I don’t spend a lot of time longing for the days when he relied on me completely. To be perfectly honest I’m not even sure that, after all this …

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Making Halloween Scary, But Fun For All Ages

Halloween is just around the corner, and from decorations to costumes it's important to keep in mind all the neighborhood's trick or treaters.

With Halloween just around the corner and kids as well as parents out shopping for costumes, decorations and crafts, it's hard to not get a little bit excited.  Last year, when an early season snowstorm struck the Northeast just before Halloween, it left towns scrambling to find a way to make the beloved trick or treat tradition happen.  I’ll never forget my son’s second Halloween. He had just turned two years old and, as an inexperienced mom, I had no idea whatsoever that Halloween costumes are best purchased far in advance. Much to my surprise buying a Halloween costume turned out to be similar to buying a bathing suit in April.  Shop early or risk not finding what you want.  Fortunately, he was too young to argue when the only costume I…

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How to Handle Back to School Bugs

With school underway, kids are going to start getting sick. Find out how to prevent that from happening.

As most moms know, back to school means a lot of different things. Busier schedules, homework, fall sports, a whole new set of after school activities, and, of course, back to school bugs.  Frankly, it almost seems inevitable that, no matter how old a kid is, they always seem to catch some kind of illness within the first few weeks of school. Now, before anyone gets crazy here I am not saying that school makes kids sick! I am, however, saying that it seems like the change in seasons, the change in schedules and even the change in scenery all seem to contribute to an almost inescapable case of something.  Take, for example, my friend Colleen. Her daughter started the first grade less than a week ago and was already sidelined with a case of …

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From The Heart of a Mom

The Choice to Have Children

My children are my world. I don’t mean that my life revolves around my children. What I mean is, I cannot imagine my world without them.

Many people get married and have kids right away, because that’s what’s expected.  We chose to wait, instead. In fact, we waited so long that when we told my husband's parents we were having a baby, my mother-in-law said, "oh, we’d given up on you!" It was funny, but it was also a reminder of the common pressure most people feel from family, or friends, or even society as a whole. It was important to us to be sure that raising a family was something we both wanted.  Just deciding to start a family was a nearly four-year process!  Even after we decided that we'd like to have children, we waited until we really felt ready: emotionally, psychologically, and financially.  They say that you're never ready to have children, and there's some …

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Moms Talk Q & A

How Do You Explain To Kids That You Have To Move?

Telling children that they have to leave their friends and school can be a delicate operation.

Moving can be traumatic for anyone. It can be especially traumatic for children, who have to leave friends, their school and sometimes, even family members. This week, the Tewksbury Patch Moms Council tackles this delicate subject. Question: If you have young children, how do you go about explaining to them that you are moving to a new new house and maybe a new town and leave everything they know? Answers: Lisa Spinelli-White -- I grew up moving around a lot and my daughter (and future kids) might wind up doing the same for a while too. I think it all depends on if you are moving back to the area or leaving for good. Being completely honest and comforting is key. I remember having to move away from Rome when I was young and all my friends …

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What Was The Best Advice You Ever Got As A First-Time Mom?

Members of the Tewksbury Moms Council share advice they were given when they were starting out.

Expectant parents and new parents are always flooded with advice from family and friends. This week, we asked the Tewksbury Moms Council to share some of the best advice they've received. Question What was the best advice you ever received as a first-time mom? Answers Sue Panilaitis -- This might be an easy question for some, but as for me, 6 kids and 15 years of parenting leaves me a with a slight memory problem (or is that just old age?). Given that I was parenting toddlers before I gave birth to my first biological child, the advice that I remember best is from my dad.  He has often told all his daughters that the best thing one can give their kids are "roots and wings" (the full quote is "Good parents give their children roots and …

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